Playing like a 400-pound gorilla

Right now I'm working on a duet with my piano teacher to play in a recital coming up soon. It's called the Grand Finale, and it's supposed to be loud, fast, and dramatic. I love fast show-offy pieces, but it usually takes a bit of prodding from my teacher to get me to sink into the keys and play with the confidence needed to really make the piece. Today my teacher told me that holding back some energy for the very end of the song and then pounding the audience with sound would have a better impact and surprise them that two women could produce such a big sound. When she said this, I realized that when it comes to recitals, girls at my school don't typically go for very loud songs and are kind of expected to pick other songs (and some female voice student always sings "On My Own"). Girls aren't expected to make tons of noise and boys aren't expected to sing ballads, which is kind of a bummer when you think about the limits it places on kids musically. I am thus more motivated to play like the 400-pound gorilla my teacher wants and to set a very loud example for the younger girls at the recital.

A tea party for girls and boys

What we're learning about gender roles in class makes me think back to the time my friend Hannah :D and I were volunteering at the Winfield Public Library during the Fancy Nancy tea party held for children. The children had a chance to dress up, read Fancy Nancy and other story books, and make a crown to take home. I expected all girls to come for the tea party and was kind of surprised when three little boys walked in and the event turned into a tea party for both princesses and princes. The boys were dressed in their best just like the girls and were perfectly civilized. They sat still during the stories and displayed polished manners that rivaled those of the girls. However, I noticed all the books read to the children centered around girls and I realized I've never seen a children's book about a boy going to a tea party or dressing up and being "fancy." Something just doesn't seem right to me. Books are supposed to open children to different ideas, but a lot of them just enforce gender lines. Maybe books outline roles for each gender so children can learn slowly without being confused with "grey area" ideas, but maybe this idea of how to teach children should change. Boys can go to tea parties and girls can play football. Maybe we should spend less time teaching them gender roles and focus more on good character.

Chinese Mothers

Let me start by saying that reading this passage totally brings back memories (gosh does it bring back memories). I can especially relate to Lulu's struggle with the piano because when I was little, learning to play the piano was actually my mom's idea and I definitely didn't take to it right away. I hated having to stay inside and practice piano when other kids were outside playing and used to cry and scream and beg for my parents to let me quit. But eventually I came to love playing piano and would pluck away for hours if I had the time. In fact, music has become something I would never dream of giving up and I'm eternally grateful my mom pushed me to stick with it. My mother, Lulu's mother, and mothers from every corner of the world force their kids to study, learn music, or play sports with the best of intentions. However, Chua can be a little extreme in her parenting methods.

Charles Cooley might argue that Ms. Chua's calling her daughter "garbage" will affect the looking glass self of her personality negatively, as shaming Sophia when she is disrespectful could end up damaging her self-esteem. However, Chua's criticism may have positive effects by setting high standards for her daughter. If Sophia and Lulu's parents expect nothing short of straight A's in school, they may come to expect that of themselves. The results of Chua's methods could go either way, which is why balance should be the main goal when raising kids, I think. While I don't agree with Chua's rules against playdates and choosing extracurriculars, I do think she has the right in idea in sitting down with her daughters to study until they do better in school. And while I never liked the way Chinese parents casually criticize their children (hey, fatty--lose some weight?), I think it's important for parents to push their kids to do their best in everything. Parents should set high expectations for their children and actively help them to achieve them. At the same time, parents should be flexible and allow their children to pursue what interests them.